Friday, April 06, 2007
Fuck-a-doodle-do!
Bad news! Awful bloody news actually. Take a looksee here. Go on.
Have you ever heard anything quite so stupid in your life? Now I am not Pepper's biggest fan; it is an album so over-rated it makes Coldplay look like a much maligned gathering of musical geniuses (rather than the plodding nursery rhyme shite-stream that they actually are) but it is still significantly better than anything that all of the other people mentioned in that article combined will ever produce.
Would I like to hear James Morrison's version of 'Lovely Rita, Meter Maid'? Would you like me to push a hacksaw blade down your urethra? The Fratelli's doing 'Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds', you say? Excuse me whilst I cut my ears out with some pointy chipboard and freed them to Bono's chimp.
Listen up all involved: you are all worthless, second-rate, indie sing-along wank stains who couldn't write a decent melody if it came up and shat in your overly coiffured hairdo. Don't touch, look at or even gesture towards any of The Beatles cannon without first genuflecting in front of a picture of Saint George (of Liverpool) and deeming yourselves unworthy of his postmortem attention.
We live in sick and twisted times where an arched eyebrow posturing as a band (Kaiser Chiefs) can consider itself a decent replacement for the greatest entity that has ever stepped on the Earth (and that includes you Mohammed).
God! This has made me angry. It's taken the edge of my Good Friday torture party.
Have you ever heard anything quite so stupid in your life? Now I am not Pepper's biggest fan; it is an album so over-rated it makes Coldplay look like a much maligned gathering of musical geniuses (rather than the plodding nursery rhyme shite-stream that they actually are) but it is still significantly better than anything that all of the other people mentioned in that article combined will ever produce.
Would I like to hear James Morrison's version of 'Lovely Rita, Meter Maid'? Would you like me to push a hacksaw blade down your urethra? The Fratelli's doing 'Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds', you say? Excuse me whilst I cut my ears out with some pointy chipboard and freed them to Bono's chimp.
Listen up all involved: you are all worthless, second-rate, indie sing-along wank stains who couldn't write a decent melody if it came up and shat in your overly coiffured hairdo. Don't touch, look at or even gesture towards any of The Beatles cannon without first genuflecting in front of a picture of Saint George (of Liverpool) and deeming yourselves unworthy of his postmortem attention.
We live in sick and twisted times where an arched eyebrow posturing as a band (Kaiser Chiefs) can consider itself a decent replacement for the greatest entity that has ever stepped on the Earth (and that includes you Mohammed).
God! This has made me angry. It's taken the edge of my Good Friday torture party.
